How to Be a Good Boyfriend

1.Understand that every girl is different. This is not a “one-size-fits-all” guide. This does however, give a good starting point for any relationship.

2.Let her know that you care for her by being interested in her. This means INTERESTED, not obsessed, so don’t drop all of your activities and hobbies and take up hers. She will find this bizarre and it will make you look dependent on her, and she will probably not like that. Just stick to your own thing, but acknowledge things she likes to do. Don’t be squeamish all over her. It’s not all about her! Sometimes it should be about you, and she should display the same amount of interest in you. If she doesn’t, perhaps you are with the wrong person.

3.Be honest. While being honest to your mate is very important, to the point of being paramount, it is equally important that you be honest to yourself. And, yes, in a mature relationship, honesty is the best policy. Tell the truth even when it hurts! It may be difficult, but the truth will allow relationships to breathe. No matter what happens, no one can ever challenge the fact that you are truthful, which might mean that the other person also gives you the same respect. If something doesn’t suit her let her know, otherwise she will not trust your opinion. But make it sound like a compliment. Suggest an alternative. For example, if she asks you if you like a dress she is trying on (trying on, not already wearing at a party!) let her know that you think the blue one suits her colouring better, or is more flattering.

4.Remember that girls are often led to be much more emotionally oriented than men. This means that many times you might be exasperated by what you perceive to be great emotional fluctuations in your mate. However, remember that unless your mate suffers from physical ailments that affect her mood, the mood swings that appear to be random for you, may very well have very significant reasons that you’re just unaware of. After all, your partner is an entire person, with a lifetime of experiences, associations and memories, and not just an empty vessel to play with.

5.Don’t brush her off. People often find it exasperating when they get the feeling their partner treats them as an inferior in a relationship. Women are no exception. A lot of women have been taught that the only way to get attention when their partner is trying to ignore them is to act more emotional and be louder until the partner finally surrenders and pays attention to her, even if in annoyance. If people feel they’re being given the cold treatment by people who are supposed to be important to them, they get worried. Especially as it distinguishes them from you without giving an explanation for why this disturbance has occurred. People aren’t mind readers, your girl is not likely to be able to guess that you’re cranky just because she wouldn’t let you do something that she felt was very trivial, while as you found it important.

6.Communicate. Do not talk her ear off, however make sure that if you have any problems that will affect your mood, she is made aware of the reasons for your problems and mood, so that you do not appear to merely be a fickle and cranky creature. Make her feel like she is the only girl on your mind. Just zone out everything around you when you’re talking to her, she will feel like she is the center of your universe. If you ask her a question, ask her because you really want to know. For example, ask her what types of movies she enjoys, or about one of her favourites. If you know it, talk about it a little bit in an honest way, what you thought of it, and make a guess at why she might have liked it. Even if you are wrong, a girl will love the fact that you are interested enough to try.

7.Give gifts at unexpected times. Anyone can buy a gift for a birthday, Christmas or an anniversary. Listen to her when you are out window shopping, and if there is something she likes, and it’s within your price range, remember it and surprise her with it in a week. For no reason at all. Or pick something up on your way home from work, and tell her you were thinking of her when you saw it. It doesn’t have to be big or expensive, a book you know she will like, or a CD of her favourite band are ideal gifts.

8.Be accommodating. If there is something she likes to do, but you don’t really like it, do it anyway, and don’t complain. You will probably find that you enjoy doing the activity because you’re with her. Most guys are unaware, but most women love guys with manners. Hold the door for her, pull out her seat, and offer to pay everytime (though allow her to pay if she is insistent).

9.Try doing something unexpected. Go to a new restaurant, try a new nightclub or go to a new part of town. Even if you both end up hating it, it’s an experience you can share and that’s what it’s all about isn’t it? Creating memories together. Surprise her by doing something offbeat– think less maudlin and more personal. This includes anything from racing her to your walking destination, dancing without music, or even bringing her a tub of LEGOS and encouraging their immediate use. You two should grow to be comfortable with each other, and doing things together without self-consciousness. Ideally, she should never feel stupid around you for wanting or doing a particular thing.

10.Compliment her sincerely. Find something particular and compliment her on it, but mean it. Don’t just say, “you look nice”. Say ” that blue dress really makes your eyes flash”, “your hair cut really suits the shape of your face” ” that perfume makes me want to kiss your neck” …and then kiss her neck!

11.Don’t whine in excess. This applies both to you and your girl. Whine, and then either try to do something about it, and ask her if she has any productive ideas that may help you, or stop whining completely.

12.Tease her. Teasing builds tension which drives girls crazy – for you! Some girls (and guys) find teasing unpleasant. Be sure you know which your girlfriend likes before teasing her.

13.Don’t forget: it’s better to give than to receive. The major religions got this right, and for a good reason: mysteriously, you gain more in the long run by giving than by getting. While love isn’t all you need, it’s the most important thing.

1 Puna

  1. para sa akin, on how to be a good boyfriend….

    alisin mo ang pride mo, because some girls are manipulative and pride-sucker creatures.

    in short, dapat lagi silang tama. lagi silang baby, lagi silang iniintindi, sila dapat ang masusunod, walang right kumontra ang mga lalake sa gusto nila, pag kumontra sasama ang loob….

    some girls couldnt accept the fact that hindi lagi pwede sila ang masusunod, at kung hindi nasunod, dont make a big fuzz out of it. wag na palakihin pa at gawin pang issue. parang ganon…

    or malas lang ako at ganyan ang kadalasan na eencounter kong mga babae?

    hehe


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